Absolutely Humbled!! (Girls on the Run 5/15/2010)

16 May

Today started like any other Sat.  since I started doing 5k’s ( Feb 14th, 2010 Love Run)  Today I had the “internal struggle…” ( as usual)   515 am… 
BOO!  Even.. 
Trust me.. I didn’t want to get out of bed, I would have rather been sleeping( come on it’s a Sat. I’d rather be sleeping, and about to go and abuse my body  *excuse me* race..
If you read my blog here you’ll see my pre-race routine it doesn’t change.
Honey and I get to Savannah State for the Girls on the Run 5K
It’s Chaos!  BOO!
Not to mention they run out of Pins!  UGH!  So, I can’t pin my race # on…  I am sooo bummed..!  I feel cheated!  I come up with something creative! I have to tuck my # in my skirt(a hot pink running one YAY) (still pissed…) 

They called “it” – And by “it”- I mean … ( line-up )
I put my head phones on..  get my warm up music on…
Put on Run Keeper…(By the way Run Keeper- you are no longer my friend!!! I found out about 1/2 that the GPS didn’t get the location.. BOO)
Runners On Your Mark…  GO!
Off I went…
And my body starts hurting!  
All I can think about is:  I just want to get to the finish line!
That’s my goal..
My breathing(check) Stride (widen a little, D tilt your hips… There you go that *feels* better…And open your hands… YES!  CHECK) Music(check) 
This race NO Timers, No mile markers( so, I take back what I said about mile markers!  I LOVE mile markers!!)

I get caught up with somebody who I had seen at last weekend’s race and I asked ” does this course seem longer to you?”
She said “YES”
I don’t know why this course just seemed to go on forever!!  Maybe it was the inclines?  Maybe it was because, I was thinking about the apple juice that I drank… When I knew better?  I don’t know?  But WOW…  Talk about pain!

Finally!   Water station…
I’m parched…(I crammed hydration… BOO ME) 
I don’t drink the entire glass enough to get my mouth wet…  HEAVEN!  

I have NO idea how much further I have to go… (again no mile markers… I miss those)
But, my body is streaming AT ME… PLEASE STOP!  My brain is saying… NO!! GO D!
Look at you! 
It’s an internal struggle! 
I want to quit!  But, I don’t I move.. 
I keep moving that’s it… that’s all I have to do it move right??  MOVE!   That’s it!  I take off again!  My body just wants to give out!  BUT my mind…  Is telling me that’s it girl… DO IT…

Then I see… WTOC… Documenting my pain.. AND you know what I want to do? 
Give them the finger!  Yep! 
I know classy right?  I feel as though they are mocking me… HAHA!
I smile and wave! 
(internally I give them the finger!  It was my private up your’s HAHA)

Finally I see it the Stadium!  And then I see them!  
The smiling faces!   That’s them my twins, my husband! 
And they run in with me… GO MOMMA GO!  
Run in HARD! 
I see the finish line.. all I can think is… DEAR GOD.. “Give me wings… 
All I want is to finish…  This God-forsaken-longest-5k-of-my-life!!!”  And I hear,  “And here is another runner for a hard finish…” MUSIC to my ears!!! 

Now I hardly ever stick around for the closing ceremonies! 
No point I never win anything…(It’s really just me wanting to sit in my van a have the air blow on my face and if I have to throw up I’d kinda like to do it in private then, in front of a good bit of people… I’d rather keep my dignity like that!)
But, Honey is a fantastic runner… So, we have been lately… on the off-chance he places… Because he is that good!  And here is another thing I didn’t know… they give out-door prizes… So, I am going to start sticking around!  

At this 5K  door prizes(YAY)- I am so sure I am not going to win anything I take off my shoes!  HMMM..   Guess what?  I won a door prize!  A swatch watch!  HAHA awesome!

Then they start calling off winners for the age groups!  I told Honey we needed to stick around, I had a feeling he was going to place…  He said NO WAY! 
Sure enough 1st place in his age group!  
Then they called- My age group second place Dolores S. I yelled, “WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
  And sure enough here walks up Honey with my pendant!  I was floored! 
Still am!  I really cannot believe that ME snail moving ME… 
I could say 1000000000000 reasons WHY I probably  did…:
1. They did not have  enough participants in my age group 
2.  They saw me crying at the end and felt bad for me! 
3. WTOC was mind reader and, KNEW I was giving them the bird and, said hey give that girl a pendant just for having heart OK… And she also gave us the mental bird!! 
 Whatever the case is… 
This is my 7th or 8th 5K I earned that pendant! 

I will wear it everyday to remind me that ANYTHING is possible…  Because, I have that internal struggle every single damn day!  Days that I just don’t want to work out…  Days that I want to eat chips (MY WEAKNESS) and things that are not good for me!  But, I now have a reminder!  Something tangible that I can see and touch! I’ve gone from a size 22 to a size 16  and that is something I can see and that is VERY rewarding but, this, this is very, different!  This is something I can wear around me neck and think ” I did this…”
I get up at 5:15 on Saturdays and DO SOMETHING because, it makes me feel good! 
Because, it makes me feel good in my jeans ( that don’t fit).
Because, it makes me feel good to drop *those* clothes off at the Goodwill.
Because it makes my trainer proud… 
BECAUSE I WILL INSPIRE, somebody to         do something , about their lifestyle that I was living a year ago…!! 

So,  if DOLORES can DO IT ANYBODY CAN!  Take that to the bank… Get off the couch and I will SEE YOU AT THE NEXT 5K RIGHT!?!?


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